Retrieve Your Soul

Every culture has its tradition about soul retrieval.
It is impossible to actually "lose" your soul in the first place. What happens is that the level of pain from abuse or mistaken beliefs is so intense it causes the soul to dwell partially outside the body.
This leads to a feeling of disconnection to the world at a deep level of being. Having your soul dwell partially outside is not dangerous in any way. It is uncomfortable - sometimes very much so. This intensity is not dangerous either - it signifies the strength of desire the two of you have to be together again.

I grew up in a violent and hate-filled home. At about 10 years of age, I rejected my self as being too broken for even me to stand. I interjected the messages I got and made them part of my self-concept. This led to a trail of broken relationships and failed business ventures through my adult life. I felt disconnected from the world; a sense of hovering and feeling I didn't belong was always in the background.

I medicated and managed the denial, disassociation and the rest of it by drinking. Sometimes, all that kept me going was my belief in the spiritual, that the psychic and spiritual experiences I had were a significator of another reality based on love and peace of mind - a reality I saw some other people living. I told myself if they can do it, I can do it.

I got up every time I fell down, I kept learning, forgiving, letting go, taking risks, wondering where it was taking me - and knowing it was better than the self-created hell I lived in. And it got better and better. I finally got to the place where I internally confronted she who had abused me the most as a defenseless child. This led, in my mind and journaling, to the image of a heavy door set into a stone wall. Pulling back the bolt, I swung it open. It led into a small, windowless cell with a table in the center. On the table was a cage, and in it was a dove.

I opened the cage door and the dove flew out and straight to me. It flew into my heart chakra, and the experience was brief, intense and joyful.

I heard its wings fluttering and saw clearly the flash of white on the underside of its outstretched wings. Each feather stood out with clarity. I am not claiming this dove physically existed. It was so powerful a process as to be physically experienced like that. And from that moment, the feeling of disconnection and hovering disappeared. This allowed me to move into the areas of healing which were unavailable to me beforehand.

How can you tell if you need to retrieve your soul? As always, the only person who really knows is yourself. A good indicator is the presence of a persistent longing of the outer you to be with the inner you.
I suggest getting in contact with your soul anyway. Write to it and about it in your journal - spend some time getting to know this part of you. You'll soon know where you stand.

And if you feel scared to do this - that is okay. Feel scared and do it anyway. If you feel the need to involve someone else for support or guidance, then do so. If need be, enlist the services of a known and respected spiritual practitioner in your area. Give the task over to your Higher Power/Self and let yourself be guided this way.

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